


I’m given this provided by wikifeet

by crowcities



Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
Genre: Cults, F/F, Gen, M/M, Possibly Triggering, Trauma, canon stuff but also noncanon garbage, description of abuse, description of harm, did i mention gay people everywhere, everyone is gay not a single one of our characters is straight god bless, if youre not in our sessions i feel so bad for you when you read these, im gonna go to hell for torturing her, lesbian cats, mostly drabbles to explore (cough) torture(cough) kat's character, mostly just Kat going thru ptsd
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-09
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:47:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 19
Words: 16,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24630292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crowcities/pseuds/crowcities
Summary: Wow everyone is either gay, traumatized, or both in this campaign.Collection of drabbles written by me after sessions we have, mostly about my character being either stupidly gay or angsty. She doesn't have a middle between them oops
Relationships: OC/OC, Original Character / Original Character
Kudos: 6





	1. Wow Kat, where'd you get that trauma? [Backstory]

Kat, dubbed “Wild Kat” by herself alone, grew up in an abusive cult. The cult wasn’t your traditional religious one, focusing around thievery and stealing for a “savior”. This savior was the cult’s leader, who relied on the member’s “”donations””. Kat was related to this savior as a little sister of sorts, but was often treated subhuman to the Savior. With this behavior, and the turning of blind eyes towards her, she felt as if it was normal.

However, one night as she went out to go steal, she was caught. An elderly dragonborn woke up in the middle of the night to a young Kat rummaging through his things. Instead of anger or reporting her to the guard, he sat her down, treated her to some coffee. He asked why she was stealing from him. Something about him, not only his old age, made her feel safe, warm. Comfortable. She opened up to him about how her brother treated her like garbage, and the dragonborn nodded. Eventually, she took her “stealing” trips to this dragonborn’s home to spend time with the grandfather figure.

As she learned how “normal society” was, she grew more rebellious towards her cult, especially her brother. Despite the increased abuse, she stood strong and kept rebelling towards her brother. Eventually, at nineteen, she gained the courage to finally make an attempt on the Savior’s life. She heavily scarred him, as he did she, before making a run for it. Having escaped the cult, she made her way to the elderly dragonborn’s house, only to find it empty, his things being packed in boxes.

She could only assume the worst, as she saw an envelope for her on a lone desk, addressed to her.

_ [REDACTED], _

_ I hope this reaches you. I know you’ve been being punished and couldn’t visit me as often because of your treatment. Despite that, I know you’ll come and visit at some point, I don’t know when, but in case I didn’t see you again I wanted to let you know what was happening. _

_ I’m declining in health, and I am unsure how long I have to live. I hope to see you again and not have to speak to you through a letter, but whatever happens, I love you just as I do my grandkids. You are like a granddaughter to me, even if we’re not connected by blood, and met through very odd circumstances. _

_ I hope life treats you well, I want you to stay strong for me. I have a few things for you located in the locked chest under my bed. The key is in this envelope. These things are not only some of the things I’d like for you to have, but also things to help you through life on your own. _

_ I know you’ll do great things. I love you, and I’ll be watching over you in spirit. _

_ Signed, _

_ Avroth._

She could feel tears roll down her face. She was too late. She knew his health was declining, but didn’t know that her attack and escape would be after he passed away. Wiping her eyes, she grabbed the key after tucking the letter into her pocket, making her way to the bed. Crouching, Kat slid the chest out from under the bed. With a click, the key opened the chest.

Within the chest was a pouch with some gold pieces, two gold rings, and a small piece of paper. After pocketing the gold pieces and one of the rings (putting on one of the rings in the process), she grabbed the paper, flipping it over to see an older photo of the dragonborn with his grandchildren, when they were younger. A note on the back said _“You may not be in this photo, but you’ll be a part of the family forever.”_

Putting the photo delicately in her pocket, she climbed to the window she came in, and left. Nothing left for her here, she makes up her mind to explore the world, steal to survive, and find her purpose in life.


	2. "I thought it was a glow in the dark bracelet.. :("

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dear god kat please stop being a stubborn idiot

_"If you don't want to lose your loved ones, I would suggest not messing with that type of magic."_

A flash of hurt spread across her eyes for a brief second, but pain quickly was replaced with anger. She was seething mad -- what did she do to deserve everyone's shit today? She may have fucked up with two of three of the blasts that she did, but in no way did she deserve this harassment over a _fucking snake bracelet_.

So what if it was cursed? It was her business, and her business only. If it killed her, so fucking what, she was cursed from birth! Kat barely remembered her own parents, she only knew... him. That _bastard_ , that motherfucker who was her only known blood relative. Kat nearly snapped, about to stand up from Dana's embrace, to say shit about how she has been cursed her whole life, what's the point in her being maybe even more cursed?

Was she irresponsible? Yes. Was she impulsive? Absolutely. But by no means was she a fucking moron. Kat knew enough about hardship, she at least gave SOME thought before taking action. She planned her escape from that awful place. Dana was the only reason she wasn't getting up and running outside to fucking destroy whatever she could with her sharpened claws. Kat didn't want to hurt the party, but the look on Temerity's face after pointing out her constant bluffs made her so, so pissed off. Just the similar cocky expression triggered the anger in her.

She hoped that fucker died after her escape. Kat slightly reached to trace the scars on the left part of her face, brushing harshly, as if to feel if they were still there. Hopefully she made him and his followers fucking writhe. She wanted to leave that history behind, but everyone ganging up on her just triggered her memories of the cult. The abuse, the yelling, the attempts to convert her to follow the one fucker who wanted her to suffer and crumble-

She inhaled, trying to calm herself, nestling her body closer to Dana for comfort. Dana's the only one she can truly trust in this party, even though she... hardly had an understanding of Dana. They knew each other for a day, barely even, but yet... something was extremely familiar with Dana. She knew Dana may not understand exactly what's the reason behind Kat's aggression and sudden semi-affectionate snuggling, but she did appreciate Dana's lack of moving away from the uncharacteristic embrace.

* * *

Dana immediately snuggled in. “Kick his ass babe, you can take him.” Even though one arm was wrapped around them, attempting to stop them from doing that exact thing.

Kat has magic, after all. Dana figured they could just blast him from the floor.  
And who else’s girlfriend had magic?! Dana was _definitely_ in love with this other tabaxi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last part from Dana's POV is a small gift from our DM, Katie :')


	3. fine. naughty people get trauma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat confronts the demon she made a pact with. Unfortunately, he's in a pretty bad mood when she does, and he doesn't tolerate her snarky attitude :')

_“I’m not so scrawny now, hu-”_

Without warning, she rose up in the air, suddenly looking down at Cosmé instead of up.

She struggled, weakly grasping at the hand around her throat. It was forceful, her throat and lungs burned for air as her windpipe was actively being crushed.

“I still think you _are_ ,” he snarled, in response to her witty comment. She didn’t see the demon anymore, she saw that fucker. She wanted to scream, she wanted to cry, but all she could do is fight for air.

So much for her being tough.

She was thrown to the ground, hitting it solidly, she laid there, gasping for air before raising the front half of her body to look at Cosmé.

He looked as if he did prior. She couldn’t see the Savior anywhere. She was actively going through an episode, but barked out, “I’m the one who killed - at least I sure _hope_ I did- the motherfucker who broke his pact with you. And I’m still here-”

“ _You?_ ” He chuckled, almost a genuine laugh she could tell, “You didn’t. He’s still alive. Whatever you thought you did _failed_ ," he drew out, almost finding it humorous that this feline thought she could ever actually have the strength she pretended to have.

  
Her eyes widened, and she couldn't look at Cosmé anymore, instead staring at the floor she was laying on. That pitch black floor. She knew she aimed for the face, but also clawed his throat out, saw him bleeding severely… how could he _POSSIBLY_ be alive-

“I know this because I share his life essence, I’d **KNOW** if he was dead.”

She choked back a sob, she couldn’t believe with all her planning and she fucking failed at her one major goal in her life. This fucking demon was the reason she was abused since she could remember, he allowed him to rise in popularity enough that when he assassinated the former leader, the cult easily hailed him as their god - their “Savior”. If you addressed him by his real name, you’d be met with abuse after abuse, beating you half to death to “cleanse” you of sin.

It was awful, and having to relive those memories, specifically of him...singling her out, taking his anger out on her… it haunted her nearly every night, even after she escaped.

That demon made her suffer for most of her life. And he knew what he did. Even if he denied it, he was the EXACT REASON she had all the scars across her body she hid under her clothes, aside from the facial scar she had.

And now he’s using her for his own gain.

She couldn’t fucking believe she was trapped in this endless cycle of being used for whatever reason. She was her brother’s “toy” to take his anger and frustrations out on -- his sadistic expression never left her mind -- and now she was this demon’s tool to protect his host? His… _whatever_ Temerity was to him.

* * *

Waking from the pitch black to suddenly standing in reality, helping to carry the eelhound they hunted prior, she felt chills. She couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched. She looked at the snake bracelet, her face crinkled in a mix of betrayal and anger, before being startled by Dana’s voice.

“Are… you okay, babe? You zoned out again…” Her eyes seemed genuinely concerned. God, even those stunning, caring eyes Kat adored couldn’t settle her nerves. Kat breathed out shakily, “I-I’m fine. _I’m alright_. Just… tired, is all.”

Extremely cheerily, Dana grins and slightly flexes, “If you want, I can carry you along with the eel!”

Thank god Dana wasn’t extremely emotionally perceptive.

“It’s fine, really. Plus, you’re hurt already-”

Dana gave a pout, almost about to protest, but accepted Kat’s denial at the proposition. Kat couldn’t believe how smitten she was for this other tabaxi, and even with Dana’s affection, she wasn’t sure if Dana was just being overly friendly to her as being another tabaxi or… if Dana actually liked her.

Either way, she couldn’t figure out her emotions at that moment. Everything was a total fucking wreck, and she was doing her best to remain the ever-so tough, angry tabaxi persona she came into this party with. She couldn’t let anyone know her history. She wouldn’t let them know, she’d take it to the fucking _grave_ if she had to.


	4. This wasn't meant to be a hurt/comfort oh no-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh god I just. had to add gay cats-  
> Nightmares are canon but that moment isnt unless dm approves

_The calico was on the pitch-black floor again,_ lying face-down. She was tired, she didn’t want to even attempt to get up off the ground. She didn’t want to talk to the demon again. Not after that experience. She had no energy left in her to bother at the moment.

She weakly looked up to see her surroundings, barely lifting her head, before being kicked forcefully in the side of the face, the sheer strength of the attacker’s kick pushing her a few feet away.

Kat coughed, spitting up some blood, and hurriedly scrambled to get up to face who attacked her, only to see a similar figure. Bright crimson eyes bore down into hers, with the intent to harm glaring in them. Her eyes widened as she started to shiver at the sight of him. The pale tabaxi in front of her shrugged at the pathetic sight.

She felt like she was being strangled. _Why was he here again? Why the hell does he haunt her, even in-_

That’s right. He wasn’t dead. Not in the slightest, according to Cosmé. She could hardly breathe on her own, every breath was painful in her chest as it felt like it was being crushed.

She croaked out, tears beginning to form in her eyes, “What the _fuck_ do you want from me?”

Instead, he grinned and laughed as he always did after she begged for him to stop, to let her live, to let her die. It was a disturbing sight, because she couldn’t hear him laugh. He had a silent laugh in this dream. She loosened her tense stance, just blatantly giving up. She couldn’t do anything to him in her dreams - or well, her nightmares. He could hurt her, but it wouldn’t appear in the physical realm. She’s been through it too many times to know this fact.

She just couldn’t believe after what she did, he was still alive. Somehow, some way. Maybe it was that demon’s doing - even if her brother broke their pact, he still had power, it could’ve kept him alive. She couldn’t hate Cosmé, they made a pact after all, but by gods was she angry. She didn’t know how to feel about him anymore. For sure, not trust him. He was the cause of **EVERYTHING** bad in her life, it seemed.

Kat was just _tired_. After finding out her abuser was alive, she couldn’t find the energy to fight back. She stared at him in horror, as his ghost-like appearance came for her. She couldn’t fight him, she couldn’t win. She didn’t win before, what could she do now?

She was forced to the floor, his hand on her throat, pinning her down, other hand up with claws unsheathed. She just braced herself, _it isn't gonna be bad_ , she thought. But he aimed right for her eyes. She was in blinding pain. It was even more painful than she remembered, just searing pain into her flesh and eyes.

* * *

Kat jolted upwards, and scrambled, unable to see. She forcefully kicked off whatever was on top of her and continued to dart in whatever direction she could to escape. _Did he blind her? Did he manage to hurt her AGAIN despite not seeing each other for years? What the hell was happening?_ She stopped, and realized she could actually see. She was standing in the graveyard outside of the safety of the temple. She looked around.

_Alone._

She crumpled, falling to her knees, resting her hands on the ground to hold her torso up. She sobbed. She saw dark, damp spots start to appear on the ground below her - she would’ve wrote it off as rain if she was in a clearer mindset, but she knew she wasn’t capable of holding her persona up after whatever that nightmare was. Her mind was a fucking wreck, she thought he was _**DEAD.**_ The only place he would’ve been alive were her nightmares but no. The gods couldn’t let that happen. He was still alive, somehow, some way, even after her attack on his life.

She was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn’t notice someone came up behind her, and rested a hand on her shoulder. She growled and whipped to lash out in defense, but stopped after seeing tired but worried green eyes staring at her. Kat just looked afraid, upset, but mostly regretful for even nearly laying a claw on Dana, suddenly bursting into even more tears, croaking out a broken, _“I’m sorry.”_

Dana wanted to say something, she didn’t have any clue what was happening to Kat -- Kat didn’t look visibly hurt, aside from the scars she had. Was it herself? She didn’t know. What she did know is maybe how to help Kat calm down. Dana wrapped her arms around Kat, kneeling on the ground beside the other feline. Dana didn’t know why the normally tough feline was shaken, but she couldn’t hold it against her.

Not even the strongest walls last forever, after all.

Kat felt Dana wrap her arms around her, giving her a gentle squeeze. Kat put her arms around Dana, grabbing fist-fulls of the back of Dana's shirt in the process. It didn’t matter if she put holes in it, Dana would forgive her. She trembled, putting her face into the crook of Dana’s neck and just... let her choked sobs out. She couldn’t bother acting like it was okay, Dana wouldn’t have written it off, she never saw Kat even shed one tear before. Even then, she had no energy left to fight back tears. Kat just accepted her vulnerability and showed it to Dana, who didn’t question her. Dana instead was slightly rubbing Kat’s back and letting a soft, comforting purr out, cooing, _“It’s okay, it’s okay.”_

Gods, she’s lucky to have this girl with her right now. Even if she couldn’t open up, Dana’s unquestionable support towards her meant the world to her as she dealt with everything she’s found out today.

Kat really, really liked Dana, but all of her memories of the trauma and reliving them was too much for her to handle tonight. She just hopes that this doesn’t make Dana think of her any less than before.


	5. They're lesbians, Harold [Not canon]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this cause im a little lesbia. lesbab. lesbien. les- GIRLS. Not canon unless DM says otherwise ;;;)  
> Dana's a little OOC but I do like to imagine she can be smart and also top energy sometimes. as a treat.

_“You purr in your sleep,”_ _Dana commented_ , more of an observation rather than teasing, as the rest of the party would have.

“I...dont?” Kat blinked, tilting her head slightly at the other tabaxi next to her. They took a small walk together, talking about whatnot, and took a seat on a fallen tree to watch and listen to the wildlife around them. They were sitting in silence until this point, and Kat was a sputtering mess at the sudden comment.

Never has she ever purred in her sleep. She’d know for sure. It’s not her style to purr in her sleep. _That’s pussy shit_ , she thought, _I'm tougher than dragon scales._ (Of course, that's a lie she told herself _constantly._ )

“Well, you don’t normally. It's only when I get close to you at night!”

“I-” Kat went red, flattening her ears and sticking her tongue out in more of reaction of frustration rather than at Dana. She looked away. It made sense, but no, she absolutely DID NOT purr. Especially around Dana. That doesn't happen, not at all. And what about that phrasing? _Oh my god, Dana, please think of what you're saying before you say it-_

“I doubt that. Maybe you hear yourself purring at night,” Kat managed to sputter out, avoiding Dana's gaze even more now.

  
“I’m quite sure it’s _you_. It’s kind of cute,” Dana started to tease, but mostly still innocently commenting. Dana didn't usually tease Kat, despite how easily she could make Kat look like an embarrassed wreck doing so. She scooted closer to the other calico.

Kat scooted away.

Dana scooted closer again.

Kat moved away. 

_\- Aaand off the edge of the fallen tree they were on._

She gave a slight yelp in shock, landing on her side. Dana snorted, stifling a laugh before pouncing on the vulnerable tabaxi who was attempting to get up, pinning her with her arms on either side of the larger one.

Kat felt a wave of fear as she had no escape, but before going to fight mode she realized it was only Dana. She wasn’t under threat. _It’s okay. It’s fine, just **breathe** -_

Dana noticed the look on Kat’s face that seemed as if she was in pain.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine..? What... do you mean, I didn’t... Fall and break anything?”

“You looked scared, if I upset you I’m sorry-” Dana attempted to pull away, but Kat raised her arm and slightly caressed Dana’s cheek, before pulling Dana in close and touched their foreheads to one another.

“I promise, you didn’t upset me. You didn’t do _anything_ ,” her voice cracked, she didn’t want to upset Dana at all. She knew Dana wasn’t to blame for her prior abuse, and Dana knew nothing of its existence. _Hopefully she wouldn’t ever._

“I… If you say so. Just let me know if I do. I really don't want to hurt you,” she pulled away to look into Kat’s eyes, still on top of her.

Kat wanted to kiss her then, tell her it’s okay even if she did. She loved this tabaxi, but had zero idea if Dana even liked her too. Dana made comments, snuggled up to her constantly, overall was affectionate in ways that made Kat’s heart soar higher than the moon. Despite this, Dana could’ve just been friendly. Farmer girls are usually very friendly, it wasn’t shocking that the same sex would be one Dana wouldn’t have boundaries around. It hurt to acknowledge that maybe Dana didn't like her, but she also didn't want to get her hopes up and trust someone so much to only get her heart shattered.

Kat knew the others found it odd that she was practically drooling over a girl they dragged along and knew for two days at this point. She wasn’t sure why she acted this way herself, something comforting overwhelmed her when it came to Dana. She knew Dana could handle herself, Dana was a strong woman after all, but she felt an overwhelming urge to protect Dana at all costs. 

Dana booped her on the nose before getting up off Kat. As Kat rose up, Dana sprinted away, looking back and sticking her tongue out at Kat. _You want a chase huh? You’ll get one._ Kat never backed down from a challenge, especially if it's started by Dana. She loved to win, to tease whoever lost to her in any competition. It was all fun to her.

Dana got a head start and disappeared in the surrounding foliage, so Kat snuck around, listening for movement. She heard birds and their odd songs, grass and other plants rustling in the wind. She could hear faint steps, close by. Before she could try to pounce, though, she got tackled to the ground by Dana, who laughed and booped her nose again. Dana grinned, and Kat put her tongue out in frustration at the woman on top of her.

“I got you!” She giggled.

 _My god, you got me more than you think,_ Kat thought. She was on her back staring up at Dana again, flustered at the position she was in again, this time knowing she wasn't in danger, let alone having the girl of her dreams over her--

Dana leaned in, brushing some of the stray hair from Kat’s face that got messed up from the fall. Gods, Kat was gonna fucking _faint_ if Dana kept this up.

“Did I ever tell you how much I _adore_ your eyes? They’re super bright… oh! The different colours are an added bonus, of course. Makes you more gorgeous.”

Oh my god, if only she could melt into the fucking earth right now. She hated feeling so vulnerable, she was putty in this girl’s hands. Dana never missed the opportunity to say what she liked about Kat -- her eyes were the go-to, though other times it was her magic, her strength, skill, -- anything Dana could compliment, she would. Kat had a feeling it was on purpose, but with Dana, she couldn't read the intentions behind the compliments. She did know Dana truly did mean it when she said them.

Didn't make it any less embarrassing for Kat, though.

She looked away from Dana, trying to hide her flustered face. Dana put a hand and cupped Kat’s cheek, forcing the wild, wiry one to look at her.

“You, do know I like you, right?”

"You like me as a friend, I figured that much out? I thought that was… obvious. Otherwise we wouldn't be here now-”

“Well, you sure are obvious about liking me more than just a friend.”

 _What? Huh?_ Kat was confused, and had inquisitive expression looking at the other tabaxi above her. _Obvious?  
_

“I know you have feelings for me, dummy,” she traced a single claw down Kat’s scar to the bottom of her jaw. Gods, Kat was easy to make shiver under her touch, it was embarrassingly easy.

“You do know I’m not entirely stupid? You are, however. At least emotionally oblivious, Kat.”

“I-” She wanted to defend herself, but couldn't even form a sentence with how weird she found this. Dana has never been this direct towards anyone, especially her.

  
“I’ll say it clear as day: _I like you_. Romantically. As in, _‘I would like to kiss you right now’_ like you. If that’s okay,” Dana locked eyes with Kat, who wished she was fucking nonexistent right now.

“Well, uh. Wow. uh. _Huh_.”

  
Silence drew out between them.

Kat stuttered out, “I uhhhh-”

  
“Just. Shut up,” Dana kind of groans and rolls her eyes, but is amused by how shocked Kat looks. Kat always seemed tough around everyone but her, and she found that kind of amusing. Kat puts up an entire persona, but when it comes to her, it falters more than ever.

She leans down, guiding Kat towards a kiss with the hand she had on Kat's cheek, which the other tabaxi returns. Kat's overly big fangs kind of get in the way, she guessed was a downside to all that, but that was one more thing Dana liked about Kat. Kat was nothing but a goddess to her, despise how wild the feline was. Others would shoot Kat a questionable glance, her appearance wasn't very... _organized?_ Guess was a way to put it. Kat looked like a monster more than any sort of tabaxi, but Dana found it unique. Kat wasn't suited to blend into the crowds, she stuck out. But in the shadows, in nature, she blended in pretty well. Guess that's why her name is _Wild Kat_ , like the wild tigers and big cats, who were gigantic and ferocious. Maybe that's where she gets her feisty nature?

Kat wrapped her arms around Dana’s neck, pulling her in closer, and Dana didn’t complain. She loved her, and finally being able to kiss her meant way, _waaaay_ too much to her.

Despite being an aggressive spirit, Kat was surprisingly gentle, nothing like Dana expected. It's as if Kat didn't want to hurt Dana, but wanted to show Dana how she felt. Instead of being demanding and passionate, Kat was methodical, never pushing limits in the kiss unless Dana permitted. The large calico wasn't as aggressive as she pretends to be, always being a timid, blushing mess with Dana. Kat never was rough with her like she was with the rest of the party. It made Dana feel special somehow, _wanted_ by this closed off individual.

They eventually pulled away, with Dana rolling off Kat and onto the ground beside her. Kat kind of inched closer, putting an arm out to wrap around Dana, but stopped, looking at Dana as if asking if it was okay. Instead of giving permission, Dana pulled Kat closer herself, putting her head on Kat's chest, purring. Kat let out a low purr and wrapped an arm around Dana's waist, resting her head on top of Dana's.

Kat could stay like this forever, but they had been out for a while and the party might start worrying about the two. Kat untangled herself, getting up and offering a hand to Dana, helping her rise from their spot. Dana bumped into Kat, leaning into her as they walked back to the temple. Even if Kat wanted to move away, she thinks Dana would've been glued to her side. Dana sort of twined her tail with Kat's, purring ever still so comfortingly. It was soothing to Kat.

 _I guess we're an item now_ , she shot a loving gaze at Dana. _I mean, I guess that was as direct as it could've been. I'm an entire fucking idiot, have been this whole time, huh?  
_


	6. Savior.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Character exploration.

The Savior, they would call him. Hailing him as the new god amongst the ranks. All except one. Some shitty little tabaxi he regretfully called his sister. She stumbled over her words, nearly calling him his true name - _no._ His _false_ name. The _wrong_ name. His name has always been Savior. **He has ALWAYS been their savior.**

He never had a filthy name such as hers. What kind of name was that anyways? All she was to him was filth. The scum of the Earth. He wishes she could just fucking die, but she kept living and braving through everything he did. Obviously, if he killed her, it’d reflect bad on him. He was the Savior after all, he couldn’t just kill because he disliked a follower. He had to simply “reform” them to follow him under a brighter light. The reformal process wasn’t easy, but if they managed to get through it, they would be forgiven of their sins and be under his good graces again. It worked most of the time.

Not without a few scars to teach them what it meant to betray his holiness, though.

But her. No, she kept _fucking everything up._ He wished she would just _fucking die_ _already_ , but she was a little cockroach and kept coming back. Admittedly, she did her best to correct herself, but she started to become more and more reckless. Too rebellious for his liking. He knew she would be a problem, and with how often she survived his reformations, he worried she could be an issue to his future.

No matter, even if she planned anything his spies would know. Even then, how could she hurt him? He was a god, after all. _A savior._ Someone in the gods' light, basking with his eyes glinting like precious stones.

Even she couldn't fuck his world up.

Until she managed to escape the guard's grapple on her, she raced towards him at speeds he didn't know were possible. She threw him on the ground, scratching deep, searing wounds into his face. Her claws seemed to scrape bone, and he couldn't see out of his left eye, all he saw was red filling his vision before it went dark. It was warm and somewhat sticky, he felt the hot liquid run through his fur and on his skin beneath.

He barely realized what happened before he started choking. He coughed and sputtered, and saw her with a chunk of flesh within her teeth.

She tore his throat out. He gagged on his own blood, trying to curse her, say something and **FUCKING MOVE** to defend himself, but he just _couldn't._

He didn't want to die to this _filth. This vile creature he was blood related to._

Guards came up behind her, ready to pile on her and stop her, but she ducked under them and made her escape.

It's a shame her assassination failed. Ugly scars may line his features, but he will live to make her pay for her betrayal.

**He will make her bow to him.**

* * *

He stared at his heavily scarred form in the mirror. He used to look much prettier, but he guessed this reflected more of his true spirit.

Like he gave a shit.

_He would rise to be a god._

His pale white coat that seemed to dazzle in any room granted him both a holy aura and a ghostly one. No matter, people gazed at him in amazement. He was a miracle, his striking crimson eyes lit up like the rubies that his followers would bring to him.

Gods, they were idiots. They thought of him as a god, and even if he wanted to believe he was, he knew deep down he was just like them.

He was smarter.

He was worthy of the gods’ approval.

He wasn’t like _them_. He was above them, in the gaze of the gods.

_He lived to let his name be known._

His unsightly appearance was intimidating to some. But in the end, fear made them follow him even more. Fear will allow him to weed out the weak ones.

He may be just one tabaxi, but he had eyes everywhere. His most loyal servants followers would deliver information of traitors. There was no escape if you dare betrayed his godliness.

**He wouldn't be easily taken down.**


	7. Deserving of Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angsty gay cats. hurt/comfort

_Pain coursed through her body as the drake mauled her with all the ferocity it had in it._ The mother drake that appeared from the earth below their feet was dangerous, ready to spill their blood.

Kat was a reckless fool. She shouldn’t have reacted with quick aggression, but Dana was exhausted and she was pissed that their progress was being halted. That everything was being disturbed.

 _Oh gods_ , how much of a fool she was. She kept lightly grazing the scale armor of the drake, if she was even doing light grazing at all. She was missing her hits, missing more than she liked.

She had gashes lining her arms, a cut over her face and a bite wound along her side. She spit out blood where she was nailed with the beast’s claws, as a result of her teeth slicing the inside of her cheek.

Her wounds also were revealed by torn clothing, which also revealed hidden scars lining her torso and back. The pain was searing.

She hissed in pain when she moved. It fucking _hurt_ , she wasn’t going to lie. But it didn’t hurt as bad as when she saw Dana lunge and put the raging beast into a chokehold.

Dana was furious, in a blind rage, attacking the drake and continuing her chokehold on it despite it trying its best to toss her off. She saw it manage to nick Dana with its claws.

She hopelessly struck at the drake in hopes of doing something to make it stop, but her claws did nothing on the tough natural armor of the animal. She kept feeling blood rise from her wounds, matting her fur with a dark red.

Tears stung at the edge of her eyes, threatening to spill over. _She couldn’t fucking DO ANYTHING._ Her girlfriend was in _danger_ and she’s _useless_ against this thing, she can’t just fucking hurt it, she can’t. She’s as useless as he said.

Just a waste of space and precious air.

What could she ever do that would benefit this world?

What did she do to deserve love from anyone?

She’s _**nothing.**_

The next moment she knew of, the mother was dead, so was the father drake. Temerity was in a rage, but surprisingly calm for such, looking at Chant. Chant was injured, Dana was with Colt. Anbrix was looting the corpses of the drakes. Cas was… somewhere. She wasn’t paying much attention. Keanai was staring at the carnage.

There was a baby drake that appeared. Kat, in a blind daze, reached her hand out to it, but it hissed and growled at her effort to comfort it.

_Probably for the best._

Keanai used her druidic abilities to take the form of a drake, soothing the now orphaned psuedo-dragon. Kat pitied the poor creature, it just lost its parents. And their murderers are trying to offer consolement. It was a really shitty situation.

Kat was too tired to shed any tears, but forced herself up and walked over to Dana. She plopped down next to her, grabbing the other tabaxi’s hand and giving it a slight squeeze to say _'I'm here'_. Before she could say anything, Dana wrapped her arms around Kat, still bleeding from her injuries. Kat didn’t know what she wanted. She didn’t know if she even deserved Dana’s affection at this point.

But what mattered right now was how Dana was and that Dana was alive.

That Dana was breathing, her heartbeat remained, and that she was going to be fine.

That’s all she cared about.

* * *

As night fell, Kat and Dana sat in one make-shift tent together. Kat kind of sighed, about to speak, but Dana piped up first.

“Soooo… I wonder why everyone’s so sad. We won, right?”

Oh gods.

 _...Really?_ Kat thought Dana was upset too. Guess Dana just... forgot.

“... _What?_ ” Dana looked confused. Kat probably looked at her like Dana just killed Chant in plain daylight. Kat shook her head, wiping at her eyes. Her fur was still matted with blood, but at least the blood clotted and stopped the bleeding.

She should probably get healed, but something else was more pressing to her.

She glanced around Dana’s body, seeing various wounds ranging from minor bruises and scrapes to a few gashes.

Kat couldn’t help but feel guilty.

Dana could have easily _died_ today.

_And it would’ve been on her hands._

Maybe the party was right. Maybe she should haven’t ever invited someone like Dana with them on this journey.

Kat couldn’t protect three people at once. She couldn’t even fucking help the one person she _loved_.

She couldn’t even fucking tell Dana outright that she loved her. She kept saying _“I’m gay for you,”_ or complimenting her. But one fucking word kept her from truly expressing her feelings for Dana.

Kat shook off these feelings, if only for a brief moment.

“Are you okay?” Kat murmured to the other tabaxi next to her, pain and guilt painted across her face. She had Dana's hand in her own, rubbing circles on it with her thumb in a way to not only comfort Dana, but to soothe herself too. Dana peered out of the open flap in the front of the tent, at the tent that had smoke leaking out of it. Chant wasn’t on fire, he was banging away at whatever he was making that night.

“...I’m fine. You should worry more about the… one who likes metal, he got hurt worse than me-”

Kat immediately stopped rubbing Dana's hand, only holding it now. She stared at the other tabaxi, brows furrowed in frustration.

“I asked about _you._ Not him.”

“I’m fine in comparison-”

“ _Dana,_ I asked about you. I asked if _YOU_ were okay. Please don’t compare yourself to the others who were injured,” Kat sounded broken, her voice cracking as if it was under the pressure of the immense guilt she had in her heart.

“I’ll be fine, trust me.”

“...” Kat sat, looking at the other girl. She was trying not to cry then and there. Dana was sacrificing herself for the sake of others and could've gotten herself killed with how reckless she was being.

“I wish I could’ve done more today. I want to protect you guys. You got hurt too,” Dana murmured to Kat, grabbing Kat’s hand instead, and lightly rubbing at the minor cuts that traced Kat's hand. She looked kind of sad, in a way, as if she felt the same crushing guilt Kat did herself. Kat wanted to kiss the pain off her face, but also wanted Dana to know what she felt about what she said.

Kat’s voice strained, a pitiful, slight wailing noise whistled as she spoke, “Dana, you were _badass_ out there. You don’t need to protect anyone, _least of all me_ -”

“I _want_ to. I want to be able to _protect you_ and your friends.”

Kat stared at Dana, looking away and scratching and a small cut on her own cheek out of awkwardness, “I… wouldn’t say we’re exactly friends, me and them. We just… happened to be stuck in the same boat.”

“You...aren’t friends? But you protect them and they protect you?”

“I… we’re not… we’re not close. I hardly-”

Dana looked away as if she was struck by an arrow in the heart. “Are… _we_ not friends?”  
  
Kat turned towards her in a panic, putting a hand on Dana’s cheek and turning her face to look at her in the eyes. She clenched Dana's other hand in her own, squeezing softly. Kat couldn’t express her emotions well, but she croaked out, “No, no. That’s _not_ what I was saying. We’re absolutely friends, and… _more_ than that.” She blushed as she rushed to say that, even then, she couldn’t say exactly what she wanted to. She was shocked Dana would presume they weren’t even friends after… after the morning in the graveyard. The admission. Dana… giving her a kiss. The nights they spent together, cuddled up. It _hurt so bad,_ more painful than the drake's bite, to hear Dana say that and look so defeated.

She wasn’t doing enough, she couldn’t make herself fucking say _‘love._ ’ Not after what happened. She’s fucking trying but it still scares her half to death.

She moved the hand off Dana's face to her lap, still holding Dana's hand with her other. Her claws dug into her own leg slightly out of frustration with herself.

Everyone she said she loved… _hurt her. Or died._ She was scared to face the fact that telling Dana she… loved her, it would lead to a road of heartbreak. Another person who either betrayed her trust or died from unfortunate circumstances.

“Yeah, I guess I’m… really gay,” Dana bluntly stated.

 _Gods, how did I fall so hard for her. I’m just glad she isn’t extremely upset,_ Kat thought.

“...Maybe I should learn magic, like you. Then I could protect you and everyone else, too,” Dana idly commented, slightly kicking her feet in the air.

Kat felt anxious, sick suddenly. Her heart never dropped so fast.

“Hey… how did you learn magic?” Dana tilted her head, genuinely curious.

“I… I learned from a friend. An old friend,” Kat scratched her jaw, rubbing her neck. It… was technically a truth, but not entirely. Cosme was no friend. He only used her. He used her for a hired bodyguard, in exchange for power.

But she was only being used. Once she proved useless he’d abandon her, if he didn’t kill her first.

“Dana, whatever you do. If someone offers to teach you magic, and they look shady, or like they’ll hurt you or anyone you care about,” Kat choked out, hiding the pain in her voice as much as she could, “ _Don’t_ accept the offer.”

“I mean… we kind of learned about that at six years old? _‘Stranger Danger’_? You know…?” She innocently chided.

“I… was raised differently than that. It… yeah, you’re right though.” Kat looked guilty, kind of fiddling with the snake on her arm.

Kat and Dana sat in an awkward silence for a moment, Kat feeling more guilt pile onto her. What if Cosme targeted Dana? Would Dana accept any offer he provided? She didn’t deserve the same shit he put her through. She hoped Cosme wasn’t that cruel.

“You know, I had a few brothers.”

Kat perked up, flicking an ear at the comment. “You did?”

Dana sighed, holding her hands together and twirling her thumbs in an effort to comfort herself, “Yeah. They were kind of mean though. _‘Dana, you’re stupid.’ ‘You’re annoying.’ ‘You’re dumb because you got kicked in the head by a horse.’_ ”

Kat’s eyes were rounded, slightly shut due to exhaustion but also sheer sadness.

Dana had went through a similar experience as she did. It wasn’t _exact_ , but Dana knew at least a small amount of what Kat went though.

“That’s… awful. I understand, I had a brother like that too. I’m sorry-”

“It’s fine, they were mean but it was mostly teasing. I love them, even with them being annoying.” She shifted, leaning into Kat who gritted her teeth to keep from hissing in pain.

She wanted to be open to Dana, but what would she even think if she did? Would she think Kat was a freak? Would she pity her as a result? She wanted Dana to see her as strong, nothing less than that.

She wrapped an arm around Dana’s shoulders, shifting her closer into her side, and laid her head on top of hers. She gave a small kiss on top of Dana’s head before returning to the former position, slightly doing a comforting rocking back and forth. Dana slightly nuzzled into the embrace.

  
All Kat wanted to do was be there for Dana. And for Dana not to sacrifice herself further.

She didn’t want to lose Dana just because she herself wasn’t strong enough. She wanted to make herself worthy to Dana and to be deserving of Dana’s affections.

**She'd have to try harder to prove her worth.**


	8. He will always have his sights on you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit just got real.

Kat was focused on Dana, happy to treat her to something, even if it’s a very small thing. She just had finished off her coffee herself, feeling less tired and weary from her travel on horseback and taking two shifts the night prior. She found the clone shenanigans odd with the Magical Starbucks(™), but didn’t complain. Whatever, she didn’t really get wrapped up in illegal magic garbage.

Well, she did, but not _that_ illegal magic. Illegal pact magic is different from illegal _hey-lets-make-a-clone-of-myself_ magic. 

At least she was fairly certain it was different.

She snapped back from her small thinking daze at the sound of metal hitting the table. Chant and Varen (the poor injured soul they scooped up off the bloody robbery trail) had opened the bag they had previously looted off the dead, hooded figure at the scene. Apparently Varen was supposed to meet up with them. War business she hardly gave a shit about at that moment.

She eyed the silver that hit the table, but wood pieces caught her eye. Chess pieces? No, they couldn’t be. One was flatter, smooth on both sides, while the other was one of a man rather than a standard chess piece.

The wooden sculpture was of a man holding a book, sort of like a professor would - at least what she pictured one doing when she heard the name - and didn’t have much emotion to it. It confused her, but didn’t pique her interest much. Maybe it was just a family heirloom, for all she knew.

She stared at the next piece. A triangle symbol with an eye in the middle, staring right back at her. Kat gripped at her arm forcefully, digging her claws slightly into it. It caused her pain, probably, the adrenaline was coursing through her veins at this point. That symbol sent chills up her spine, she had a feeling...  
  


Maybe it wasn’t, but it likely was.

_He’s always watching._

A wave of anger and panic set in, she slammed her hands on the table, wavering for a moment as if she didn’t know what she even wanted to do. Her body decided for her, twisting, shoving the chair back a little too hard to make it clatter to the floor and she darted out of the bakery.

She had to get the hell out of there.

He was closer to her than she could’ve imagined.

He was going to hunt her down for her crimes. For her assassination of him previously.

Kat _knew_ it was his goal to find and hunt her down for what she did.

She gritted her teeth, slicing her lip with her bigger fangs. She didn’t care, she wanted to get away from that fucking symbol. Kat didn’t care if the party was worried, she didn’t want them to worry, but she couldn’t stay in that room any longer if they asked what it meant. 

Kat felt tears sting at the edge of her eyes, and kept seeing herself switch back and forth between the halls of the cult and of the dusty trails of the village and main road as she ran. The scars on her face and torso ached with the memories flooding back to her, and in an attempt to prevent seeing them, she shut her eyes. She didn’t want to see. She didn’t want to see that place ever again.

Who was she kidding? Even without the flashbacks while she was awake, she’d still be in that dump while she was asleep in her dreams. She was at least able to deal with those fairly well. Kat was a tough one, ever since she stood up for herself and assassinated the Savior.

But reliving it when it’s triggered? She couldn’t deal with that. Kat wanted a way out.

_Even if you escaped his sight, you’d never really escape._

_Death was your only escape._


	9. Kat! It's 4pm, time for your daily dose of trauma!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fml im so mean to her

Kat stumbled over her feet as she ran from the cafe. She felt aching in her legs and her body was exhausted, both from the sudden physical burst and the outburst of emotions. Kat collapsed next to a tree, her back against the rough trunk as she slumped next to its roots. 

She just couldn't believe it.

She tried to kill the cult off, but it's still kicking.

The Savior _came back_. Came back out of desperation for power or… _something else_ had it out for her. Either way, nothing could really deny the fact he wasn't now amongst the living, seeking power and control as she was still breathing.

She had no doubt that he wouldn’t die until he saw her take her last breath.

She let out a choked sob, curling in on herself. She hugged her knees and dug her claws into her legs, the pain somehow helping in a sick, twisted way she couldn’t quite put her finger on.

She thought it was over. She thought she was safe… well, _safer_ , now that he was gone. But oh wait! He fucking _wasn't._ Someone resurrected him and now he's walking, breathing, and probably actively hunting her down as she sits here crying her fucking eyes out.

Who was she fooling but herself? He was always going to come after her. He was going to assure himself that she would die before he did.

She heard movement close by to her and peeked out of her huddle, only to see a white-furred hand reach towards her. She flinched hard and backed up further into the trunk, hissing and frantically trying to get away from them.

"Please _don't-_ " she choked out with her voice strained, closing her eyes and shoving her arms in front of her to block the attack.

_Gods, he was here already, he already found her and she was vulnerable and easy to kill, she couldn't fucking breathe-_

"Kat, hon-" a familiar voice said in a worried tremble. She felt a hand slip into her own and give a slight squeeze.

Kat looked over to see Dana crouched in front of her. Dana had wide, worried eyes, and reached out slowly to touch Kat's face. She actively flinched at the motion, but when Dana caressed her cheek, she leaned into it a little and put her other hand on it. 

"Are you okay?"

Kat stayed silent, feeling the urge to just sob more at the question. Dana always asked her if she was okay, every time she felt like bawling her eyes out and telling Dana everything. But she didn’t want Dana to think less of her, let alone burdening the other tabaxi.

"...Kat?"

"I...I don't know. I got reminded of…"

"Reminded of what?" She quietly asked, trying not to pressure an answer out of Kat. Kat was upset, the strongest person she knew was shaken up and trembling in front of her, the last thing she wanted to upset Kat further.

"...My past. I… had a bad home. It… wasn't great for me."

Dana felt that Kat was hiding information on purpose, but she couldn't prove it. She didn't want to push it anyhow.

Kat felt bad for covering up the whole truth. But she didn’t want Dana to know. And even if she let Dana know, she was afraid it’d get back to the party somehow. Being a previous cult member wouldn’t be a very good look for her. She was a victim, yeah, but either way, it just wasn’t the best of looks.

"I think I understand. The past will catch up to you…" she trailed off for a second, "but remember what you have _now,_ you know? Even if you feel like you have nothing or no one… you do. It just doesn't seem that way sometimes." She rubbed Kat's tears away a little, giving a small, reassuring smile.

Kat didn't feel better entirely, but hearing Dana speak and talk and touch her in an attempt to comfort her, it did calm her down. She saw they were in the woodlands outskirting the village, not too far from the bakery. She could kind of see it a ways away.

She didn't see the building and hallways of the cult. She didn't feel like he was nearby.

Kat rushed Dana into a hug, clutching on the other tabaxi as if she'd disappear if she let her go. Dana returned the hug, rubbing circles on Kat's back and cooing. 

"How about we head back to the inn?"

Kat stayed quiet, having her face rest in Dana's shoulder. She **_REALLY_** didn’t want to go back.

"I want you to be safe. You don't have to talk to _anyone._ You don't even have to say a word to me. Just _please_ , come back with me. Let's go back to the inn, yeah?" She pulled away to look at Kat, hands on the other’s shoulders, giving a small squeeze.

Kat had a guilty expression, looking away, but nodded. She couldn’t run forever, after all. She learned that pretty quickly the other day.

Dana got up slowly, putting her hand out to Kat. Kat grabbed and held onto it even after she got up, which Dana let happen (with small readjustment to make it comfortable to hold) while walking back to the inn.

Kat looked at the ground mostly, but kept glancing at Dana to make sure she wasn't one of the cult guards taking her back to the Savior for punishment. She may have been calmer, but as she kept her eyes open things felt so... _off._ She kept having brief flashbacks to the cult, how life was so, so cruel there. But Dana kept her grounded.

She was _here._

She was here, in the present, with someone she loved more than she could ever say in words. Someone who just saw her crack under weakness, someone who consoled her despite only knowing her for solely her strength. Dana saw through Kat's facade most likely anyways. She asked if Kat was okay when she was on edge and constantly tried to make her feel better, even if it was beyond Dana's own control.

She wasn't stuck in the cult anymore. She wasn't being abused. She was in the outside world. Yeah there was danger, year there was a war she just was forced to be involved in, but whatever. She was away from the cult and around someone that cherished her for her. That's what matters right now. It kept her stable. Her constant.

She was still slightly trembling, still trying to calm herself down further. When they reached the inn's loft, Dana led her to the bed to lie down. Kat didn't want to let Dana's hand go, looking at Dana with fear when Dana let go. She felt like Dana was gonna disappear and let her fend for herself. She didn't want to be alone.

Dana kinda chuckled, she never really saw a vulnerable side to Kat before, but rolled into bed with Kat and held her close to her. Kat let out a small, somewhat sad chuff and snuggled into Dana. She didn't want to be alone, especially tonight. She needed someone to keep her grounded, hopefully just this once.

Dana was a reminder that she escaped. She may not have truly escaped his sight, but she can at least believe it right now as she lied down next to the one she loved.


	10. Haunting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fuck.

_Screams._

Kat jumped up, hearing one certain scream in particular.

An older, male dragonborn, raspy voice calling - yelling - for help.

_Avroth._

That was impossible. He was dead.

...They were in a haunted forest. He may be dead, but his spirit could exist here. It could very likely be him.

She bolted out of the wagon, and into the surrounding forest in the direction of the yelling. She felt tears prick at the edge of her eyes. She could say goodbye. Kat had one chance to see him and tell him thank you properly.

She shoved branches and brush aside, sloppily dodging trees as she ran. Kat heard footsteps stomping after her, a chorus of them. The party, likely, but she wasn’t focused on them. Only the shrieking voice.

Alongside the dragonborn’s calls for help, another voice called out. A younger male screaming. She suddenly saw Chant running beside her, and somewhat darting past her with extreme urgency in his steps.

They reached a clearing, and it went eerily silent. She and Chant frantically looked around the area, with the party catching up.

The screams surrounded them. _They were everywhere._ Chant covered his ears and was cowering, and Kat pressed her ears flat against her head, wrenching her eyes closed.

The deafened crashing of a tree made her jump and turn, only to see Dana get hurt by the now-fallen tree. She immediately reached out in worry, but stopped after seeing the beast at the roots of the tree. Her blood ran cold.

Kat’s fur stood on end, feeling frozen in place. The amalgamation of faces on the beast warped and twisted, all speaking or screaming. The beast had large teeth and dripped blood constantly out of its enormous maw.

It smelled of rotting corpses.

She spotted a dragonborn’s face, oddly who looked like Avroth. It called for help. Kat winced.

She wanted to sob, she was too terrified to move closer to even attempt to tear him out of the beast. She shook herself, although too scared to get closer, she readied a dagger at the beast to throw. She figured the beast took advantage of her attachments to Avroth to lure her out here. As she threw the dagger and it pierced the beast, she heard Dana gasp.

“ _M-mom?_ ”

Kat’s heart dropped. Dana’s mom was dead, she remembered. Dana never outright said so, but she put context clues together. The bracelet, the way she spoke about her mother.

The beast took advantage of that to upset Dana. It pissed Kat off.

The beast turned towards Kat and Chant, who were closest to it, and struck them with its claws. Kat felt the blood pour out of her fresh wounds from the beast, gritting her teeth. Dana looked horrified.

Kat didn’t want to worry her. _Fuck._

The party took turns wailing at the beast, until Dana shook herself and snarled, lunging at the beast and attempting to put it in a chokehold. She failed, and took a spot by Kat.

After attempting to hurt the amalgamation, the thing bit into Dana, leaving her heavily bleeding. Kat was mortified, this was all her fault, it was her fault that Dana was in such high danger.

Thank god Keanai got Worm, the drake they adopted, to drag Dana away. Kat was heavily injured and knew that she may have not lived the next attack, so she also slunk away, but not without firing a few blasts from her snake bracelet at the beast.

* * *

The next moment, it was over. Temerity slayed the corpse beast, and Chant was there lying on the ground unconscious. Colt raced over and helped Chant regain consciousness and heal his wounds.

Kat winced. She almost got two people killed all because of a stupid illusion.

Dana came up behind her, limping and putting pressure on her own ribs.

“Are you okay?” Dana rasped out, hissing in pain.

Kat couldn’t look at her.

“I’m… I’m fine. Are… you okay? Worry about yourself…”

“I’ll be-” Another hiss of pain, “I’ll be _fine._ Others are hurt worse than me.”

_Gods, could Dana please worry about herself? Could Dana not worry about her?_ Kat wanted to cry. She felt crushed by guilt.

They returned to the horses, Kat hanging out in the front of the wagon alone. Dana rode on the horse in front of Kat, holding her ribs.

Colt whimpered, but asked softly, “Does anybody need healing? I-I have...a few spells left.”

Dana remained silent. Kat looked at her, shook her head, “Dana does.”

Silence.

Colt pointed a finger, whispering a _‘bang!’_ , and Dana relaxed a little more, looking less rough. Colt returned to his small toy and stayed quiet.

This was all Kat’s fault. No one would say it, but she knew she fucked up. She should’ve known it was fake voices, those that mimic people you knew in life.

But she didn’t want to deny it could’ve been him.

But that selfishness almost got Dana and Chant killed today.

She didn’t deserve them. Everyone was kind to her, at least not mean to her anyways. She mostly felt like she didn’t deserve Dana.

Dana was bright, happy-go-lucky, and believed in the best of everyone. She was always concerned for Kat, stood up for her back when she was being interrogated at the temple, and comforted her after she rushed out of the cafe the other day.

Dana was _too good_. She deserved to be back on her farm with her family, maybe date and marry a nice farmer girl like herself.

Dana didn’t deserve someone who was reckless and a spineless coward at that. She didn’t deserve someone with so much emotional baggage. Someone who was dangerous and constantly got into danger.

_Danger that could get Dana killed._

* * *

When they set up camp, Dana glanced at Kat, but went to sleep in their tent. Kat took first watch. She couldn’t sleep with Dana. Not tonight. She didn't deserve that at all.

Dana took second watch with her and Chant. Kat didn’t say a word, kept glancing back at Dana, who was looking at Kat most of the watch. She managed to drag Kat into the tent after some pleading, but once Dana fell asleep, Kat crawled out of their sleeping bag and sat watching Dana breathe.

Gods, she wanted to sob. She wanted to apologize to Dana, telling her that she deserved better than herself. Dana didn’t need to be with Kat. Dana could be with anyone much better.

_Much, much better._

Kat silently cried, letting a few tears roll down her cheeks before rubbing them away. If Dana woke up, Dana would instantly worry about her. She didn’t want Dana to worry. She caused enough trouble already.

She didn’t deserve to be forgiven. She didn’t deserve the party. 

Kat _especially_ didn’t deserve Dana.


	11. Memory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wow flashback dream sequence lol

“████, my child,” He traced a claw under her chin, leaning over in his chair. The room was blindingly white in comparison to when Kat was last here. She knows she vividly remembers this, but the details were either fuzzy or erased. It was a dream state, nothing more, nothing less -- the finer details weren’t important in dreams.

“You were told to bring back something, yet you didn’t.  _ Why was that? _ ” He stopped, starting to apply pressure to her skin where the claw was. She felt nothing as she was going through this for the hundredth time it felt, and probably was. Despite that, she still felt her body tremble.

His voice was sickly-sweet, wanting to get what he wanted, but knew to show that he wasn’t afraid to get violent to get the answer he wanted. He was known slash ears off and rip teeth out if his patience was tested enough.

She wasn’t sure if it was the flashback-self or if it was her body instinctively reacting to the memory with fear. She forced herself to feel nothing as she stared into the now-blurry face of a black-and-white tabaxi with larger ears, and a longer snout.

His features were muddied.

It had been a while since then, at least ten years. She was maybe what, eleven?

Kat was put up to this task of disobeying the then-Savior. He snarled in impatience at her lack of response, but spoke in a chilling coo.

“My child. ████,  _ talk to me. _ Tell me the truth and no harm will come to you.”

She blinked. He didn’t lie most of the time from what she recalled. He wasn’t nice, far from it, but he was more fair and kept his word for the most part.

She breathed, about to speak, until his expression became clearer to where she could see his wide eyes. A horrified one, as a body shoved him forward. Blood leaked from his mouth, his golden eyes showing shock at the sudden attack.

A snow-white tabaxi stood behind the chair, clearly older than Kat but a young adult. Her blood ran cold at the sight of him.

_ Her brother. _

He took one look at his hand that had some specks of blood on it, wiping it away on his clothes. He stared with disgust at the twitching tabaxi on the floor who was gargling on his own blood, reaching for the knife in the back of his neck. He ripped it out, which made the black-and-white tabaxi spasm in pain before giving a final twitch as he expired.

“████.”

She looked up at those startlingly cold, ruby red eyes. He looked at her with the same amount of disgust.

He set her up to act as a decoy for him to assassinate the Savior. He told her of his plan, and threatened to torture her to death if she didn’t listen. He’d rip out her teeth, create deep wounds all over her body, the likes, if she didn’t cooperate.

So she did, out of fear for her life. What else was she supposed to do?

She stood, and looked at him. Kat glared, but somehow trembled while spitting out, “Are you happy now, S͎͖̅e͉̓͘⬛̷͕̋⬛?”

He snarled and lashed out, slapping with claws straight across her face. She fell to the floor from the sheer force behind the attack, holding her face that was now bleeding.

“That’s NOT my name, idiot. It’s the  _ Savior _ . Address me as such or you’ll get harsher punishment than what you just got,” he gritted his teeth, smoothed over his fur and walked over to the dead body, crouching and muttering. His tail-tip was twitching, such as it would in amusement. He was probably spitting vile words at the now late tabaxi, as well as making sure he was actually dead.

Kat removed her hand from her face, seeing the blood. It’ll heal. Whatever. She knew it was a dream, but she couldn’t help herself from rising up from her spot and walking off.

While he did abuse her before he became the Savior, she knew this was the turning point where it got so,  _ so _ much worse for her.

_ He _ was the reason she had scars lining her body.

_ He _ was the reason behind the flashbacks she now had.

_ He  _ haunted her in dreams and memory.

And now? He was _ hunting her down. _

She couldn’t escape him if she could help it.


	12. Sunshine.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gay? Gay people? Jesus christ

Kat was very smitten. She wouldn’t admit it if you asked, but she knew it as much as anyone.

She constantly had her eyes on Dana. She just couldn’t look away. It was like Dana was a magnetic force, pulling her towards her. Dana was hardly seen without Kat, they naturally gravitated to each other. It almost seemed painful to take them apart as well.

Dana radiated sunshine, a bright light that Kat never saw before, let alone she could never be herself. To say Dana was the light in her life was an understatement. Dana showed her that there was absolute good in the world, more than Avroth showed her before his passing.

Kat never thought she would trust someone, let alone have romantic attraction towards them. But there Dana was, someone who she literally only met maybe a couple weeks ago, who she now (proudly) called her girlfriend. My my my, how the tables turned.

Something about Dana screamed to Kat that she wouldn’t hurt Kat on purpose. She wouldn’t betray her. She enjoyed being around Kat and would initiate any affectionate action, which Kat would either be too flustered to return or be competitive and return the affection. Kat was shocked she was able to love someone, especially after the shit she went through.

Kat felt… safe. Warm. Around Dana, she felt like nothing could hurt her. Obviously enemies could, but it was the feeling that counted. She felt invincible when she was close to Dana.

Nothing could amount to the worth Dana had to her.

The cult was a threat, as well as the time limit on her own life, but… Kat forgets about all that when she’s able to lie down with Dana and embrace her. Dana grounded her in reality, but also allowed her to escape the bad part of reality. The situation she and the party was facing.

Dana helped her forget her past, a promise that after their adventure… they’d be happy. At least she hoped so. She felt connected to Dana, something tugged her towards her. As if fate, destiny, the gods, whatever - wanted them to be together.

And Kat wouldn’t argue against that.

Dana was worth to Kat more than her own life.

* * *

Dana plopped down on the bed, immediately sighing as she got weight off her legs.

“I’m tiiiiiired,” she declared, taking a look at Kat and spreading her arms and legs across the bed, sticking her tongue out teasingly. “It’s my bed now!”

Kat’s expression softened, forgetting her guilt. Dana had an innocence to her, even if it was feigned, Kat adored. Kat shuffled over to the bed, and even though Dana said no, she climbed up and hugged her knees on a small space on the bed.

With others, she’d shrug and sleep on the floor.

With Dana, she didn’t want to do that. It was strange, her abuse prevented her from seeking out touch and avoiding touch when possible. Dana, though… she radiated some energy that calmed Kat. Kat knew Dana wouldn’t hurt her.

She trusted Dana.

Dana groaned, pulling in her limbs and twisting on her side, patting the bedside next to her. Kat knew Dana always wanted to cuddle, even going as far as to drag Kat away from serious conversation to do so. She found it oddly charming, Dana craved affection from Kat as much as she did Dana. Kat snuggled up affectionately, letting out a small purr, finding out Dana immediately conked out after making room for Kat.

_ Poor girl must’ve been absolutely exhausted. _

Kat lightly brushed Dana’s bangs away from her eyes. Even with her lack of elegance and care getting into the bed, Dana looked ethereal. Like a goddess.

Kat gave a small kiss on Dana’s forehead before wrapping an arm around Dana’s waist and letting sleep take her under.

She wouldn’t have nightmares for that night.

  
  



	13. Perspective.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How does Kat currently feel about everyone...?

Kat has been with this party for nearly two weeks. Not long enough to feel incredibly bonded to them, but has grown to respect each member. Everyone had their own stories, and respected her, though she didn’t know if it was out of fear or genuine respect. 

Temerity, a tiefling who specialized in magic. He was a kinder soul who seemed to have a sadness overhanging him, like a stormcloud. She didn’t bother to reach out, because he was often reserved and didn't want to talk about whatever plagued him, which she couldn’t blame him for.

He was odd around her, but everyone was pretty much. She wasn’t the friendliest, nor was a kind face to see. _Whatever._ However, she realized he knew more about her than he was letting on. When she asked to keep her past quiet, he promised her that. So she has high respect for the tiefling, even without knowing too much about him.

Speaking of Temerity, she couldn't forget he was bonded... _pacted?_ To Cosme. Cosme was someone she didn't know how she felt around. He was cruel to her, but has slowly started being nicer towards her. She didn't know how to respond, but she knew he did fear her, at least. That was a start. They both also mutually despise the Savior, so they had that going between them. She promised she'd make the bastard pay, not only for herself, but for Cosme too, as a result of their continued pact.

She slightly hoped they'd get along in the future, rather than be in a business deal. But she wouldn't admit that for a long, _long_ while.

A second tiefling, Chant. A metalworker, a gunslinger. He was a threat, even if he didn’t look much like one with his fragile frame. Chant was able to take an enemy out with one shot, she found it impressive. He was somewhat of a loner, working away in a forge at some project of his. She didn’t bother him, he looked extremely focused in an effort to distract himself.

She knew of his history, he told her point blank when she spoke to him and Temerity. Kat could sympathize with him, losing someone you love and taking a life with your own hands (in a sense). He was a sad spirit, trying his best, she could tell that much.

Their third tiefling was a burning red, suiting for her fire druid abilities. Keanai was someone she didn’t know well. She found her strong and reliable, often impressed by her conflicting kindness and strength. It goes to show someone with so much power can be extremely kind, with the right balance. She was awestruck by Keanai’s powers, she was very in-tune with nature and her own emotions. Although, Kat found it worrying how much Keanai slept, but Keanai _seemed fine_ so it should be alright?

Cascade was a contrast to Keanai, having cool, ocean blue skin and flowing hair that seemed to float on top of the wind. A genasi, something she hasn’t seen before. Cascade wasn’t any less than the word gorgeous. She was clever, allowing the party to escape the mimic ship with extra time to spare thanks to her water-bending abilities. While Kat knew very little about Cascade, she knew Cascade was a force to reckon with, and easily could outwit an opponent in combat. She had to respect that, at the bare minimum.

Anbrix was… a _unique_ individual, to say at the very least. The halfling had no problem appeasing her wild side, and was a partial bad influence on Kat. Kat tended to be more crazed around Anbrix, which she had little problem with, but the party seemed to look at them with odd eyes. It made Kat nervous, but Anbrix gave zero shits. Anbrix was Anbrix, no one could change that.

She sort of understood Anbrix. She hid her name, and had little to say about her history, just like Kat. Lately, however, it’s been coming out of the woodworks, slowly but surely.

Anbrix’s parents were part of the cult. Anbrix ran away from that. Just like Kat did, without the assassination attempt, anyways. Anbrix seemed terrified, and Kat understood that fear, they were hunting Anbrix down for being a traitor. Even though Kat didn’t reveal her connection to the cult, she felt connected to Anbrix through their mutual traitor status.

Dana… Oh dear. Dana had Kat’s heart wrapped around her finger. She never thought she’d let someone be so close to her, but god Dana was different from everyone Kat has ever met. Dana radiated sunshine, some energy she’s never seen before except from Avroth, her grandfather. Dana was charming, kind, sweet… but also incredibly badass. She’s never seen such extreme ferocity clash with pure kindness before. It was a sight to behold.

Dana wasn’t without her own sadness though. Her mother was dead, her brothers weren’t always nice, and her father… couldn’t even look at her, after her mother’s passing. Dana had an air of mourning and sadness as she spoke about her family. Kat understood that sadness. She felt overwhelming urges to hold Dana’s hands and kiss the sadness away, but she knew that was unrealistic. Sometimes even when the sun is shining, it rains.

Colt… was a breath of fresh air. She’s witnessed a child like him. She wondered at times if she would’ve been like him as a child if she wasn’t raised in the cult, at least from her earliest memories. Kat sympathized with his lack of not knowing who his parents were, she never… she didn’t remember hers. All she knew was that they were gone. Like Colt knew about his.

Poor Colt didn’t understand why the party had arguments or why many of them were sad at times. Under Cosme’s will, he was being grown up physically very quickly. But now, even with that being stopped, Colt was still forced to grow up emotionally due to what he was being exposed to. She felt like an older sibling to him. And she vows to protect him as such, to do much better than her own did for her.

She wouldn’t let him die under her watch. 

_She wouldn’t let any of them die if she could help it._


	14. Fuck.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wow depressing

Screaming. Smoke and ash fluttering down as bright flames licked the trees surrounding them. Orange and grey littered the forest Mel reigned, as Kat stared at the sudden chaos.

Mel was huge, and absolutely raging angry. Kat jostled awake, going on high alert. She glanced around, observing enemies and seeing where everyone was.

She realized these figures were familiar. Black robes, small gold linings...

_The cult._

Anbrix was being dragged by two figures, her wild, feral instincts kicking in to fight back. Anbrix bit at them, and clawed at them with her fingernails.

The rest were fighting the cult members that were somehow flooding the territory Mel kept well-guarded.

Despite the chaos she realized someone was missing when she checked.

_Dana._

She whipped wildly around, taking a double take and seeing who was there. Dana wasn’t to be seen.

_They fucking took her._

_They took Dana._

Chant fired shots, killing a cultist that was on Anbrix, while injuring the other. Kat snarled and tackled into the other cultist, making him release his hold on Anbrix. She held him back, teeth bared all while her claws were at his throat. She noticed he was a halfling, with a crazed look in his eyes.

The cult definitely changed after she left.

“ **WHERE IS SHE** ,” she demanded, almost in a yowl, ready to shred him if he said one wrong thing. Her primal instincts were ready to spring, ready to turn this man into strips of halfling confetti.

“She’s returning to the Savior, along with the halfling-”

“Why _her_ ,” she growled at him.

He chuckled, “The Savior missed his dear little sister. She’s going back to him-”

She hissed, her claws digging into his skin, “You fucked up. You’re looking right at her. You got the **_WRONG ONE._ **” Her tail lashed in anger. She couldn’t fucking handle this bullshit right now. He was playing games, toying with her. She knew that.

“...It does not matter. The Savior will have a form to return to,” he smirked. She hissed again, slamming him to the ground and pinning him.

Around her, the noises of the fight died down. She glanced over to Chant, who had four cult members on their knees next to him, groveling to Melody. Chant nodded at her, and pulled out his gun.

Kat glared at the halfling she had pinned under her. She knew no mercy for the man, the man who was a follower of her only blood relative. The man who kidnapped the wrong tabaxi. The one who allowed her beloved to be stolen away without checking to make sure they had the right one.

She took one hand and grabbed his throat, before tearing his jugular out. She narrowed her eyes, letting out a snort as the man let out his dying breath, choking on his own blood. Kat noticed his eyes looked more frantic, less glazed over, before he died. But she didn’t care. He didn’t deserve mercy from her claws.

She let the halfling bleed out on the dirt as she walked over to where Chant was. She took a position by him, crossing her arms next to the tiefling.

She stayed quiet, observing the charmed cult members. Two tabaxi caught her eye, familiar faces… but she didn’t know their names. Probably passed by them in the cult.

Chant was pissed off, interrogating the cultists one by one. They said the wrong thing? He shot them point-blank without mercy.

Kat couldn’t blame him at all. If he didn’t kill them, she would’ve torn them apart.

The last one was a dwarven man, with shaved features. Odd, but he was a cultist. Who knew what he was up to.

She stepped up, resting on her hackles in front of him, knees bent. She glared into his eyes. He stared back. “Where is she. _Where are you taking her?_ ” She snarled.

“To the wastelands, where the Savior is-”

“ **WHY.** Why did you fucking take her?”

“The Savior wants his _dearest_ little sister back, you know.”

Her eyes narrowed, claws flexing.

“You grabbed the wrong fucking one.”

“We came for a tabaxi and a halfling,” he struggled, but glanced over at Anbrix before looking back at her and Chant.

“I’m saying you grabbed the _wrong god damned tabaxi._ You’re looking at the sister of the Savior right in front of you,” she bared her teeth in a low growl. She was growing impatient. He was playing her too. She had no time for these games.

She grabbed him by the hair on top of his head, snarling at him. She made him look directly into her eyes. “I watched him die. _I tore his fucking throat out._ I took an eye on the way out with my own claws.”

A flash of recognition crossed his eyes, before returning to his calm demeanor, “It doesn’t matter. He will get what he wants. He will return. His soul is eternal.”

“ _Eternal?_ ” She couldn’t help but laugh. “I watched him kill the previous Savior in front of me, dipshit. I witnessed the assassination.”

“He is alive, and has risen to bring us to eternal paradise.”

Chant huffed, “Kat, are you done with him? You got the answers you wanted?” Kat sighed, and shoved the dwarven man down, letting go of his hair. “I _suppose._ ”

She walked a little ways away on shaky legs as she heard the loud _bang!_ of Chant’s gun. She balled her fists, claws digging into the pads on her paws. She bit her lip, trying to contain what she felt.

She didn’t like crying. She didn’t like expressing emotions other than anger. It’s what made her strong and feared throughout her time outside the cult.

Afterall, she killed a false god. She should be feared by many, it left her to be herself. Left her to be without anyone close to her.

Despite her fearful appearance, Dana fell for her. Dana wormed her way into her heart and she couldn’t resist that. Dana mattered so much to her.

She fell to her knees, bloody palms on the grass in front of her. She couldn’t help but let out a sob. It was her fault, her fault alone, that Dana got grabbed. And now she’s going to be tortured, or worse, killed, by the Savior.

All because Kat _loved her._

All because he wanted revenge on the sister that took his life originally.

Kat was selfish. She knew that. She should have never invited Dana along, she never should have fell for that smile. The sweet farmer girl who was just too alluring to resist. The sunshine Dana brought in her life shouldn’t have existed for her. She didn’t deserve Dana, all she did was put Dana in danger. If nothing said that before, it did now with Dana’s capture.

She was scared. Kat admitted that to herself. She was fucking terrified of what could happen to Dana. Dana could be being beaten, her teeth being torn out, or even worse. They could be killing her now as soon as they find out Dana wasn’t the Savior’s sister. _Gods, why couldn’t they have grabbed the right calico?_

Now Dana was in harm's way and right in the Savior’s hands. And he’d know she was someone important to Kat. He knew Kat like that.

He’d do what he could to her to make Kat suffer. She hoped for the best, that he’d spare Dana in place of taking Kat’s life when she found him.

Kat didn’t mind letting him win if it let Dana be safe.

She raised herself up on her feet, letting out a few more choked sobs and rubbing her tears away. She couldn’t be like this. She had to stay strong. She had to find Dana and see if she was alive. Kat couldn’t let Dana go until she actually told her three words.

 _The three damn words she couldn’t say._ She’d make herself say it as long as they get Dana out safe.

If she was alive, Kat would offer her life if it came down to it.

If Dana wasn’t alive, Kat would attempt at the Savior’s life again, even if it costs her own in the process.


	15. Anew.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :)

She had him pinned under her, his form beaten and bloody. Yet he still smirked, snarling up at her with wild eyes.

“How the fuck did you come back?” Kat glared at him.

“The Savior will always return. I’ll be back.”

She snorted in annoyance. She summoned her psychic blade, reinforcing her claws with bright pink-purple energy. She snarled, rushing her claws across his throat in one motion.

He gave a last snarl of defiance, soon gurgling on his own blood that was rising from his torn open throat.

The Savior was dead.

She sighed, and stared at the white, lifeless form in front of her.

The Savior, who was her brother Key, was dead. By her own claws. No celebration. It was quiet. You could only hear clanking of chains from Dana’s former restraints, and sounds of heavy breathing from the fight. It was as if no one dared to speak out of sheer disbelief of their win.

Blood dripped down her face and arms from wounds she gained from him in the fight. He sure did underestimate her strength.

She looked around at everyone, cocking her head slightly to the side in confusion.

... _Who were these people?_

_Why were they injured?_

_More importantly, why weren’t they worshipping her?_

She furrowed her brows. She knew these people, what was she thinking? They were the ones she went adventuring with. The ones she befriended over the few weeks they’ve known each other. One of them she called her beloved.

The ones who helped her kill Key.

She glanced down at her bloody hand, flexing her claws slightly.

She was Kat.

No, her name was Locket…? She stared confused. Her hand was red with a mix of her own blood and Key’s.

She was the Savior. No one else.

Kat shook herself. What the hell… _What was happening?_ What was she thinking?

_You’ll do._


	16. What ifs

Kat didn’t know what she felt. Anguish? _Relief?_ She had no idea as she stared down at the Savior's bloody corpse, covered in wounds and had his throat torn open. It was shredded by her own claws, which dripped with blood onto the ground beside them.  


The white shape beneath her was her brother. The only flesh and blood relative she knew that was left.

And now he’s gone.

By her own volition.

She didn’t know what to feel. She was glad he was gone, and that she finally got rid of him. He abused her. He treated her like his punching bag, and wanted nothing more than to eviscerate her in their fight.

He used her to gain power in the cult, using her as a tool to distract the previous Savior to assassinate him in front of her. She felt numb to that memory of the black and white tabaxi falling beside her with a knife in the back of his throat, through his spinal column. 

She wouldn’t forgive him for what he did. He used her constantly as an example of reformation to the rest, but used her to take out his rage. She winced.

He was gone. For good.

She also felt a twinge of sadness. _Could have things been different? Was he an innocent child before, or was he always power hungry?_

_ Could they have been proper siblings? _

_...Would they have escaped together? _

She’d never know. She never knew their parents, maybe he did, she wouldn’t know now. Kat frankly didn't care anymore.  


Overall, she felt relief from his death.

Now she can be at peace.

She can live her life without fear of the cult.

Unfortunately, that’s not the case when it comes to the death of the Savior.


	17. After.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the campaign. Timeskip by a few months.

Kat wasn’t really ready for “settling-down” life. She was on the run for years, seeking new thrills and trying to avoid the memories of her past. That was her life. Staying in one place for long… was new to her.

Killing her brother, The Savior - no,  _ Key _ \- was her ultimate goal. She did her best and failed the first time, but brought him down with the help of the party. She never felt such anguish and relief at the same moment as watching the light die from his eyes. He wouldn’t come back.

It was over.

But it really,  _ really _ wasn’t.

As she sat there, she glanced around, suddenly unable to recognize the faces around her, and wondering why they weren’t kneeling asking for forgiveness. To be promised an afterlife in Eternal Paradise.

She looked down at her brother’s corpse, her bloodstained hand. She forced the thoughts down, swallowing like bitter medicine.

She then realized the Savior was a possession. But she didn’t realize it would last  _ this long _ .

Domestic life wasn’t her idea, she wanted to continue seeing what every day brought her, but she agreed with Dana to run a farm life, with some adventuring sprinkled throughout the years. It’d put Dana in less danger too, less risk of being kidnapped again by some crazy cultists.

Even though Dana said it was fine after her relentless apologies, Kat still felt guilty. She could tell it haunted Dana too, the nights they spent together where Dana would wake up shivering. The clanking metal and any form of yelling startled Dana too - it sent her back to where she was chained to the wall with a muzzle over her mouth.   
Kat felt incredibly awful. The only way she could help is with reminding Dana that she wasn’t there anymore, that Kat was there, and adored her.

Kat even managed to spit out that she loved her. Dana was over the moon about that.

Dana had to show her the ropes of doing things in an “at home” life. Gods, the first time she saw a kiln surprised her.

She… admittedly had a lot to learn. Dana seemed to enjoy the closeness, showing Kat how to help calm horses and feed ducks grapes without getting pinched by their bills.

It was those moments that helped Kat fight the possession.

It was hard at times, there were always bad days and good days when it came to the Savior. Dana, from day one of it appearing at Mel’s forest, took it in stride. She knew something was wrong with Kat, but it wasn’t Kat who would say mean things. It wasn’t Kat who thought she was a god.

Kat couldn’t have found anyone better.

The Savior was something Kat could live with fighting. Some days she felt like giving in, but would look at Dana or feel Dana next to her, and realized she HAD something to live for.  _ Someone. _

A life with Dana was worth fighting this possessive force, even to the grave if she had to.

So when the Savior took over one day, it reached to claw Dana. Kat wasn’t having it.

“I oughta put you in your place,” it snarled with her voice.

She targeted it in her mind, _ “Oh hell no you don’t.” _   
“What are you gonna do about it?”

Kat’s body jolted, the arm that was reaching up to swing at Dana was grabbed by her other, with her claws tearing through the flesh.

The pain was enough to send her back into control.

_Serves you right, bastard._

_ Wait. Fuck. Now there’s blood on the carpet. _

Dana stared, then looked at Kat’s bloody arm before racing off to grab wrap. When she came back, she frantically wrapped the deep gashes to stop bleeding.

“You know I could’ve taken the hit,” Dana stared to fuss, but Kat shook her head.

“My body can handle it. I don’t want to lay a hand violently on you, even under possession,” Kat shakily said, trying to sound tough despite the event shaking her and  _ oh god the pain was burning _ -

But Dana’s safety was worth it.

“Plus, now I can control that bitch by force,” Kat smirked, grabbing at what seemed to be an invisible neck with her free arm, before glancing at the carpet, then at Dana, “I’m… sorry about our carpet though-”

Dana giggled at that, shaking her head.

“You’re an idiot more so than me at times, you know Locket?”

Kat stared at Dana with a shocked expression, mouth slightly agape.

“You… used my real name?”

“Yeah?”

“... _ Why? _ ”

“I felt like switching it up. Plus, your expression was priceless. And, to be honest, it’s a gorgeous name, fitting for an even more handsome person,” Dana seemed to say this with slight teasing, but continued to wrap Kat’s wounds.

_ Holy fuck.  _ Kat remained silent, looking away and sticking her tongue out in frustration at the embarrassment she felt.

She’d have to get used to the domestic lifestyle, but if it’s with Dana, she didn’t think there was much problem with it.


	18. Past Memories

With the Savior in her, she was plagued by nightmares of memories of past Saviors. Their deaths, their lives, their ferocity haunted her.

A few stood out to her, ones she couldn’t forget, even if she wanted to.

Firstly, she was in an old house. Blood stained the old wood flooring, slowly growing in a puddle as she stared. Fire dimly lit up the area as she glanced around, seeing two bodies in particular.

One was a fairly small tabaxi woman, one with black and white coat patterns. The other was a larger, orange tiger tabaxi who looked as if in his final moments he was crawling towards his beloved.

She felt the feelings of indifference, possibly even disgust, at the sight from the Savior she was reliving the memory of. She didn’t know how she felt, she relived this memory a dozen times by then. She knew who those two were. They were her parents she never knew.

She glanced over to see two shapes huddled together. A smaller, white tabaxi child holding onto his little sibling, who had a mostly darker coat with white and orange accents.

Her and Key.

This was when the Savior scooped them up. Her younger shape didn’t protest, only letting out a small whine of fear. It was embarrassing to see herself like that, but she couldn’t blame her younger self. She was a child who witnessed a cult kill her parents.

Key was ferocious for a child, fighting against the Savior, reaching to claw him in the face. The Savior found it amusing, she could tell. He wanted them to be his successors, loyal followers of him up until he died to pass on the torch.

She was disgusted.

Next memory was when she saw herself kneeling before her. Kat blinked, realizing she knew exactly what eyes she was viewing herself from. The toxicity in this Savior’s voice was dripping. She never realized how rank and vile this Savior was, his mind rang with thoughts of punishing her severely. It was painful to witness.

She felt a knife in the back of her neck, crumpling forward and not being able to move. She moved her eyes up towards Key, as he drew the knife out of her neck. Her vision went dark, before looking at her younger self again and the now dead Savior.

Kat was Key then. Key didn’t resist the force, moreso welcomed it with open arms. He wanted power, and so he got power.

The final memory would tear her apart, to the point she couldn’t even look at Dana without extreme guilt for a while.

There was Dana, chained up to the wall with a muzzle over her mouth. She was growling, pulling against the chains in attempts to get at the Savior. The Savior found this amusing.

It was the wrong tabaxi and yet, it would let him get revenge anyways. Obviously if this tabaxi was with his sister, _the sister that ran away like a coward after attempting to kill him,_ she was important to Locket.

Kat felt disgust at the way he thought. It was sadistic, a manic mind. 

He punched Dana, getting her to let out a hiss of shock. “What are you to Locket?”

Dana stayed quiet. The Savior narrowed his eyes, and laughed a bit. Of course, she changed her name too. _A coward will do whatever it takes to run._

He paced, staring at Dana like a hungry hunter about to attack its next prey. He was vile.

_Well, if I can’t use the halfling as my vessel, I can just use her-_

A knock came from the door.

Kat realized this was when the party was about to enter the room. She found out that the Savior was going to use Dana as his next vessel because Anbrix wasn't there, nor was Kat herself.

He snarled, but once the disguised Anbrix revealed they had Kat with the line of prisoners, he started to laugh. He was ready to kill this little rat once and for all.

She never felt more glad that she was the one who was possessed.

If Dana was possessed by the Savior, Kat wouldn’t have ever forgiven herself. She hasn’t forgiven herself yet for making Dana suffer.

No matter how much Dana hides it, Kat knows what happened back then scarred Dana. Dana prevented putting muzzles on some of the donkeys, and even avoided putting leads on the horses. Even bringing those tools up made Dana flinch. So Kat avoided it, but would grab Dana’s hand and rub circles on them to help soothe her.

It was Kat’s fault after all, that Dana had to go through it. It was her responsibility to try to fix it.

Kat knew she didn’t deserve Dana. But she couldn’t leave either. Dana needed her. They were each other’s rocks, in a sense. Their own reminders that they lived through the impossible.

Despite the possession in Kat, Dana took it in stride. She wouldn’t let the Savior get to her, and Kat admired it. Kat would lie awake at times, thinking… if Dana didn’t exist in her life, would she even be...herself right now? _Be the Kat she and Dana knew now?_

Dana would tell her to stop thinking about the what ifs. So she did. Kat would focus on the now, and hopefully find a way to end the possession cycle for good.

She’d do it with Dana by her side.


	19. . . . ?

...What do you want?

_ I just wanted to talk, you know. _

_ Nothing important. We coexist now, especially since you resist me. _

...You give in?

_ No. I’m not gonna give in that easy. _

Then why are you talking to me.

_ Oh, you know. Sometimes it gets lonely being chained up by your host who just keeps resisting and breaking out of every attempt I make to take over. _

…

_ You know, you have it good. A loving girlfriend, a supportive adopted family… _

...Your point?

_ It’d be a shame if something happened. That’s all I’ll say. _

...You won’t do anything. You know I wouldn’t let that happen.

_ Oh, I know, dearie. I haven’t forgotten. Just thought I’d remind you. _

Sure.


End file.
